January 2nd


533: Mercurius becomes Pope John II, the first pope to adopt a new name upon elevation to the papacy and to avoid any more damn credit offers in the mail.


1974: President Richard Nixon signs a bill lowering the maximum U.S. speed limit to 55 MPH… mostly to help the flagging career of Sammy Hagar.


2004: Samples are successfully collected from Comet Wild 2, and after analysis, it’s determined that the comet is responsible for several unsolved sex crimes.